Anyway, that's all just a side note, I really wanted to type about what's been on my mind lately. I love being a mom! Babies are so awesome. I've been letting go a lot lately. Maybe I just need more sleep (ha! as I type this at 11:00 pm when I could be sleeping!) or maybe I'm hitting that 6 month point where things get easier, or maybe the postpartum depression is easing up. At any rate, I feel great!
However...
I couldn't sleep last night, my mind kept racing :P
Can I tell you a little about Jeff? (yes, I know I'm rambling. I'm allowed to, I have a bad case of twins.) He really is a wonderful man. I think I married him on pure instinct and I keep learning why we're so perfect for each other. We got married on my parent's anniversary, and had our first kids on his parent's anniversary. The sealing room in the St. George Temple where we got married was the same one my great-grandmother, whom I'm named after, was sealed to her husband in. There's so much past around us, and so much ahead of us. I did find someone who makes me want to be better. He may not realize it, and I probably wouldn't ever tell him, but he's changing me. (He doesn't read my blogs. It's just not him.) There's so many good things he wants, and I want them too, but I tend to be lazy. We're both like that I guess! :D My mom was saying the other day that the character Emma in Jane Austin's novel Emma, never wanted to pay the price. She wanted to play the piano as well as Jane, but didn't want to practice, she had a trunk full of unfinished drawings and embroideries and such. So much that she wanted to do, but never wanted to pay the price that went along with them. I get the feeling from a number of people that me being in Page right now and Jeff staying in Salt Lake is some sort of red flag in our marriage. It's not it at all. I'm restless and need a change of pace every once in a while. Well, and I did need to get over the breast infections, which I was finally able to do! Yea! But I thrive on change and new things. I didn't come here to avoid Jeff. That's not to say our marriage doesn't have its fair share of bumps and rocks, but it's a good marriage, we're a good match and we love each other. We are willing to pay the price to keep our marriage going strong. But since he is who he is and I am who I am and our marriage is what it is, we need to find out how to pay that price on our own. I've never doubted him and I've never doubted us.
Well, maybe I should get a little nap before those little blessing wake up.
Vivian
=^.,.^=
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